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Why Sisters of Frida?

Posted on Monday, February 22nd, 2016


logo: picture of a green and yellow bird with a blue background in a stamp like frame, perforated edge.

Sisters of Frida CIC is an experimental collective of disabled women. We want a new way of sharing experiences, mutual support and relationships with different networks.

Sisters of Frida started at a meeting when we floated the idea of having a disabled women’s group. It took some time to come together – the co founders were Eleanor Lisney, Michelle Daley, Eleanor Firman, Maria Zedda, Svetlana Kotova, Frieda Van De Poll and Martine Miel. We became a CIC in 2014.

We are seeking to build a/or different networks of disabled women.  The barriers and multiple discrimination have not changed, we struggle to have our voices heard as disabled women in our own rights.

We would like a sisterhood, a circle of disabled women to discuss, share experiences and explore intersectional possibilities.

Facebook group (for UK residents) : https://www.facebook.com/groups/sisofrida/

Facebook page : https://www.facebook.com/sistersoffrida/

See our last AGM with the new Steering Group.

Carly Findlay: My face scared my cleaner away today

Posted on Monday, December 12th, 2016


Thanks to Carly Findlay for permission to repost this paragraph. She addresses some of the responses we get from society as disabled women – that we are scary because of our impairments such as what happened to Cerrie Burnell and Rhiam Dean both in 2009 at their work place. We would like to think that things have improved since then but it is not just our employers who discriminate against us but it can also happen with employees too.

This is my face up close. It’s red, shiny and a bit lopsided because of a dodgy lymph node that flares up because of my inflammation. It’s usually very smiley. Sometimes my hair is out of control, and sometimes there’s a few bits of wayward skin hanging off my face and hair. This is who I am.
Earlier this year my face scared the post office worker. Today it scared the cleaner. So much so, she ran away without completing the job.
It’s exhausting having a face that can scare people. Even more exhausting worrying I’m seeming like a victim as I recall events like these.
I work from home now. Every second Monday a cleaner comes. I usually leave the house to go to the library when they come, but today I needed to stay home until I finished something.
I greeted the cleaner, saying hello. She jumped, visibly shocked at my face. I let that one go.
A few minutes later I went out again to tell her to let me know when she needs to vacuum the room I’m in, and I’ll move for her. I spoke before I was in the room. As she turned around to look at me, she jumped again.
I told her “please don’t be scared of my face”, and said this is just how I look. I returned to the other room.
20 minutes later, I finished the task at hand, and realised I couldn’t hear or smell any cleaning being done. I looked through the house. It’s not very big. She wasn’t here.
She just left. Didn’t lock the door. Didn’t let me know. She left because she was scared of how I looked.

Read the rest on Carly’s blog.

 

Focus Group participants required: Why Women-Only services matter.

Posted on Monday, November 21st, 2016


To feed into the Women’s Resource Centres’ (WRC) research into Why Women-Only services matter.

Save the date!
Saturday, 10th December
Arrive from 1:30 (tea and coffee available), 2-4pm Focus Group.
Unit 3 Marquis Estate, St Pauls Road N1 2SY.
The Number 30 and 277 runs past us and we are a short walk from Canonbury Station which is fully wheelchair accessible.

We would like between 8 – 15 women who access / are a part of Sisters of Frida to be participants in one of our focus groups.

We would provide all women service users who participate in the focus group £30 as a small thank you.

WRC are updating their Why Women-Only research, originally completed in 2007. WRC’s members want this research updated because the need for robust, concrete evidence of the importance and value of women-only services remains vital. The link to the original research is here:
http://thewomensresourcecentre.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/whywomenonly.pdf

We are running 6 focus groups, with a range of diverse women-only services. In the focus group I will ask questions about why accessing a ‘by women for women’ service is important to them, and what difference coming to a women-only service has made to their lives; what being in a peer-led group means to them, and what kind of issues they are exploring through Sisters of Frida. I will be facilitating the focus groups, which will each run for a maximum of two hours.

The focus groups will be completely confidential. No service user will be identified in the research. I will record focus groups on a Dictaphone, and transcriptions will be used to outline themes, and to use quotes. You can get a copy of the focus group transcript if you wish.

The research is due to be published in March 2017.

Focus groups conducted by Darlene Corry. Please send n email to hello@sisofrida.org if interested.

Disability and sexuality film day: Sat 26 Nov, Islington, London

Posted on Tuesday, November 1st, 2016


After the 4 workshops on disability and sexuality, Sisters of Frida is presenting films which explore themes of disability and sexuality.

Films to make you:  Think, feel, laugh, shake, desire and more…..

With food and discussion

Please note the films contain controversial themes, they also contain scenes of nudity and frank explicit discussion of sexual acts and sexual desire as well as scenes depicting violence.

We welcome all self-identified women. We also welcome FtM, genderqueer and intersexed persons who, in terms of lived experience or identity, have experienced oppression as women in the past or present.

Date and Time

Sat 26 November 2016, 12:00 – 17:00 GMT

Location

Disability Action In Islington, unit 3 Marquess Estate

St Paul’s Road, London N1 2SY

View Map

 

Please register at the event brite  or write to sof.disabilitysexuality@gmail.com

Poster of a smiling woman holding a glass with a straw in her mouth. There is text announcing awards for the film

Margarita, with a straw 

(A rebellious young woman with cerebral palsy leaves her home in India to study in New York, unexpectedlyfalls in love, and embarks on an exhilarating journey of self-discovery.

With Kalki Koechlin, Revathy, Sayani Gupta)

 

and Sins Invalid

Image of webpage with naked person in bath tub

Sins Invalid: The film

(“Sins Invalid is a performance project on disability and sexuality that incubates and celebrates artists with disabilities, centralizing artists of color and queer and gender-variant artists as communities who have been historically marginalized from social discourse”)

 

Please register at the event brite 

or write to sof.disabilitysexuality@gmail.com 

A Big thank you to Queer Cafe!

Posted on Sunday, October 16th, 2016


Queer cafe, make new special friends, build community, chalked blackboard on the pavement outside a house in the evening.

Folks at Queer cafe were kind enough to invite Sisters of Frida to give a talk  2nd October and offered to donate their takings for the evening.

Dyi Huijg and Eleanor Lisney went along that night and Dyi gave a talk on disability. We had a lively Questions and Answers session after the talk. We also had some excellent vegan food.

Thank you Queer Cafe people for being so kind and generous and giving us a great welcome!

They can be contacted at @queercaff

At Youth Action Festival: our rights as women and girls

Posted on Wednesday, October 12th, 2016


Sisters of Frida was invited to give a workshop at the Plan UK #Standupforgirls Youth Action Fest last Saturday following the success of last year’s event. We were lucky that Fleur Perry agreed to help us run a workshop on Inclusive Campaigning.

Eleanor and Fleur had about 10 participants – we discussed access and showed a couple of videos and quite a few discussions. Participants were incensed to hear of Fleur’s difficulties to get to the event because her issues with wheelchair spaces on the train. We discussed disability itself and what it is – it was good to hear their perceptions and solutions towards more awareness. It was clear that they enjoyed Fleurs’s delivery and that she enjoyed it too.

Fleur leading the workshop, shes in a wheelchair but theres another woman in the picture

Fleur leading the workshop

program

programme

Visit from Deputy Minister, the Hon. Alexia Manombe-Ncube

Posted on Tuesday, October 11th, 2016


When we were in NYC at the UNCSW in March earlier this year, we met Hon. Alexia Manombe-Ncube, Deputy Minister: Disability Affairs in the Republic of Namibia. She kindly agreed to be on the panel for our side event.

She said she would like to visit the UK to get some benchmarking ideas about independent living – we gave her some contacts including Inclusion London and European Network of Independent Living (ENIL) and arranged for her to visit a local Disabled People Organisation in Greenwich (GAD) and she also met with Sisters of Frida : Eleanor Lisney, Sophie Partridge, and Michelle Daley. Michelle Baharier (who was also at NYC for our panel) was able to join us later.

It was great to meet the group of people who came with her too in August and we hope they found the visit a useful one.

Four women and a man sitting around a table, two women wheelchair users, one with scooter. Shes holding a mobile

Sisters of Frida, Sophie and Eleanor, and Michelle Daley  joining on mobile phone, with the Hon. Alexia Manombe-Ncube and her colleagues

 

6 women, 1 man in group photo, 2 women in wheelchairs and one in a scooter.

At the Greenwich Association of Disabled People (GAD)

 

Submission to the Human Rights Council’s Universal Periodic Review (UPR)

Posted on Thursday, October 6th, 2016


Sisters of Frida with the Women Enabled International provided evidence to the United Nations Universal Periodic Review of Human Rights of the United Kingdom. We focused on disabled women and specifically on violence against disabled women and domestic abuse.

You can find the report at UPR submission PDF and UPR Submission .doc

Eleanor Lisney: Disability and Sexuality workshops

Posted on Monday, August 15th, 2016


Last night one of my new colleagues expressed surprise on  mention of my children – she said she had no idea I had children. She did not mean it to be malicious but the fact I have children prove surprising to most folks. I think, to be brutally honest, most people do not expect disabled people to be sexual beings let alone have offspring.

And for disabled women it is doubly problematic. Consider the stereotype of being a woman –as a caregiver, as a sex object, mother, housekeeper – you get the picture? Many of those roles are not seen to be within the capacity of disabled women. All the media, films of disability and sexuality are from the perspective of disabled men where they have their needs fulfilled by non-disabled women. Examples, Me Before You (even if he did not think it was enough to keep him living), The Sessions, there not many based on the needs of disabled women (excluding Children of a Lesser God).

There is not much space afforded to disabled women on sexuality and how to factor in disability in the search for companionship, romance, relationships and sex. The narratives are missing. I was made aware how much so when I joined the group of women who went to the first workshop (there are a series of four workshops) lead by Sisters of Frida steering group members, Lani Parker and Dyi Huijg, on Dis/ability and Sexuality. This workshop was titled Crip Sex, Because We Want It Our Way

As disabled women we have a wide range of experiences, positive and negative, around disability, sex and sexuality. Disabled women are sexy, sexual, passionate, loving, caring, desirable, hot, beautiful, strong and much more! Our experiences of sexuality are also affected by different kinds of oppressions such as ableism, racism, sexism, heteronormativity, classism and age.

 

In this workshop we will explore what sex means for us as disabled women, non-normative sex, positive self-image, exploring sex alone and sex with others

 

I felt we really shared our experiences as disabled women intersected by faith, culture, and sexual orientation. We examined the differences with impairments, acquired and from a young age, we spoke about chronic illnesses, the barriers and effects of medication and age. Does sex alleviate pain, do we/should we have sex when we are in pain? We compared the attitudes of social workers, medical practitioners and partners – in and out of relationships, domestic abuse from families, society and community pressures.

 

I cannot wait for the next session. I hope more people will come to visit this wonderful space where we afford each other sisterhood and non-judgemental sharing.

workshops

Themes and dates of the workshops

Workshop 1: Crip Sex, Because We Want It Our Way (finished)

In this workshop we will explore what sex means for us as disabled women, non-normative sex, positive self-image, exploring sex alone and sex with others.

Date: Sat 30 July

Time: 12-4pm

 

Workshop 2: When It Doesn’t Feel Good and It Isn’t Right

In this workshop we will discuss negative experiences and difficulties we have around sex and sexuality, our boundaries, consent, privacy and ableism in relationships.

Date: Sat 27 Aug

Time: 12-4pm

 

Workshop 3: Disabled Desire: Sexy and Sensual Possibilities

In this workshop we will discuss positive experiences we have and want to have around sex and sexuality, pleasure, and what it means to desire and be desired.

Date: Sat 17 Sept

Time: 11.30-3pm

 

Workshop 4: Sex: Getting What You Want and Need

Here we will build on the other workshops, and discuss how to develop confidence and feel empowered to do and want sex differently, challenge internalised oppression and other obstacles, and talk about how to put our desires and needs into practice.

Date: Sat 22 Oct

Time: 12-4pm

this project was funded by

logos of RSA and New Unity

 

 

 

— ——

Eleanor Lisney

Eleanor Lisney is a founder member and coordinator of Sisters of Frida. She is an access advisor, an NUJ member on the New Media Industrial Council and the Equality Council. She is also on the British Council Disability Advisory Panel and the web team of the International Network of Women with Disabilities.

 

End panel Brexit discussion

Posted on Monday, August 15th, 2016


SISTERS FRIDA – DISABLED WOMEN’S VOICES FROM THE FRONTLINE

Blackfriars Settlement 9 July 2016

END PANEL DISCUSSION

Panel: Kirsten Hearn, Miss Jacqui, Pauline Latchen, Eleanor Lisney, Becky Olaniyi,

Jagoda Risteska, Jasmina Risteska, Annabel Crowley

Contributers: Michelle Daley, Dyi,

Eleanor introduced an update from Dyi. The Disability and Sexuality project that Djy

and Lani have piloted with an initial meeting last autumn has now got funding to go

ahead. The next meeting will be in July at the New Union Church Hall and thereafter

every month. The project will provide a safe space to discuss issues around

disability and sexuality. More information and details are listed on the Sisters of

Frida website.

Annabel noted that the day had involved lots of interesting and powerful

conversations. The Brexit vote had provided a focus for discussion: the situation

was already difficult before we faced leaving the European Union and things will be

likely to get more difficult: now is the time to make sure we have a voice.

Eleanor commented that if she had not been at this event, she would have been at

Conway Hall to support a rally of Black Activists Against Racism to protest against

spending cuts. As she was unable to attend that rally, Eleanor had written a letter of

support and solidarity which she read out.

Annabel asked everyone what were their concerns in the light of Brexit.

Becky said that she felt there was not a lot of clear information about Brexit,

especially for young people; they should have had an opportunity to contribute and

make decisions. Older people believed that leaving the EU would mean that the

money saved would be paid into the NHS etc. Young people had mainly voted to

remain in the EU but were not really clear why – and people needed to be clear

about that.

Dyi raised the issue of being an EU citizen living in the UK going forward. We need

to think about the reality of that situation, for example in relation to people’s status

with the NHS. This is a real issue for EU citizens in the UK who rely on the NHS –

though of course it may be different for those who don’t. However, Dyi pointed out,

there is also a lot of inequality in relation to healthcare within the rest of the EU.

Annabel asked if Dyi would be looking for wider consultation with EU migrants to

have more information about the implications of Brexit for them. Dyi replied that she

is looking into the legal implications and building up an information bank on relevant

services as a resource which she will be happy to share with others.

Michelle said that we don’t know what the future will look like. She had voted to

remain in the EU, and there was not, had not been, enough information about what

Brexit would look like, or how our lives will be changed by it.

Kirsten said that the whole Brexit campaign had been based on lies, especially about

the NHS and migration. Secondly, all the years of austerity have influenced people,

especially poorer people: these people see migrants and refugees as competing with

them for jobs, services and benefits and these myths are further spread by

politicians, who paint migrants as lazy scroungers. Migrants enrich our country,

however, and it is not true that all migrants come to Britain to claim benefits rather

than to work. Kirsten said that in her local community there has been an increase in

racial hate crime and that the referendum result is advisory rather than mandatory

and parliament should act accordingly. The government should now consider what

things can stay the same and what should change: for example things like

wheelchair spaces on buses and braille labelling, these sorts of things should stay.

Michelle said that when her parents came to the UK, there were signs in public

spaces saying ‘No dogs, no Irish, no Blacks’ and we are going back to those days

and with the same discrimination against disabled people.

Miss Jacqui said that the people who had voted to leave didn’t really know what they

were voting for. Whatever political party is in power, disabled people – disabled

women especially, will be at the bottom of the agenda. Politicians don’t consider

that the decisions they make now will still affect us in ten years’ time. Starting a new

political party is the only solution. She was not happy with David Cameron as prime

minister but is not happy at what may follow his resignation. We need to find and

develop our voice and consider where does it feel safe to talk.

Becky said so many politicians are leaving their jobs, and Michelle said it was their

job to have a plan (going forward). Becky said politicians exist in a bubble, all this

doesn’t affect them, they don’t think: it’s about the money they can make, the secret

deals and they only think about what affects them. Kirsten said she felt quite

depressed now.

Annabel said we do have voices however we express ourselves. How do we build

and expand on safe spaces to express ourselves? Kirsten said that we need to talk

to the communities that voted for Brexit, especially poor people, people who are

alienated. She is trying to talk to people in her street who voted leave, to try to

understand why they did – we haven’t listened to them in the past. One issue is

employment: people going for jobs, not that skilled, which go to migrants: ‘They’re

taking our jobs’. That, and well qualified people paid low wages for jobs they’re over-

qualified for and all the time the right-wing press reinforce the view that migrants are

to blame.

Dyi said that there is a history of colonialism, racism and imperialism and we should

consider what Sisters of Frida can do to support each other. Annabel said we should

consider what resources – communities and spaces – we can build on and share.

Pauline said that wages are being driven down but it’s not the fault of migrant

workers: low wages here are better than what’s on offer in their own countries. We

should blame the government and business owners, not the migrants. Miss Jacqui

said that some people are really picky about what jobs they will take: if you really

want a job you’ll take anything, you will find a job. Blaming migrants is just an

excuse. Michelle said the government is using a tactic of divide, rule and conquer

and what happened in the referendum is just history repeating itself.

In conclusion, Annabel said the discussion could continue on line: this is one way we

can add disabled women’s voices to the discussion. Maybe there could be a Brexit

forum page on the SOF website; a lot of disability rights have come from the EU and

therefore the discussion could link in disabled friends in Europe.

All present were invited to pass on their email addresses to receive further updates.

Videos from Disabled women’s voices in the Frontline

Posted on Saturday, August 13th, 2016


Here are the videos from the day Disabled Women’s Voices from the Frontline Saturday 9th July, 11am – 4.30pm 

Introduction by Annabel Crowley

Simone Aspis

Sophie Partridge and Penny Pepper

transcript

 

Kirsten Hearn

transcript

Miss Jacqui

transcript coming soon

Pauline Latchem

transcript

Guests speakers – Jagoda and Jasmina Risteska

transcript

notes from discussion

Many thanks to for funding this event

rosa fund logo